This particular blog is not really for my family and friends.  This is for other cancer patients.  The newbies.  The ones that are facing the hairloss and struggling with it.  And struggling with the big question of "should I shave it?"  Just keep that audience in mind as you read this.

Hairloss is hard.  As I stated here, this can be one of the most gut wrenchingly difficult things about cancer diganosis and treatment.  From my experience, many women facing chemo have the same question: to shave?  or not to shave?

And honestly, it's a personal decision.  Here's my very long winded version of how I came to my decision (seriously get a glass of wine, this is long).

I'm a competitive person.  Cancer is my opponent in this particular game.  When I found out I had cancer, my goal during treatment was to not allow cancer to win... anything.  I didn't want to let it take my life.  Or ruin my career.  Or take my sense or humor.  Or push me into an emotional depression.  I was determined to fight cancer on every front. 

My goal was to allow cancer to change my life as little as possible. 

This is the mindset I took into my battle.  

The decision to shave my head was a part of that mentality.  I didn't want to wait for my hair to fall out because I wanted it to be on my terms.  I wanted to decide which day I'd go bald. 

Yes, that makes me sound like a control freak, but I'm sure a few of my fellow cancer survivors can relate to that.

So 16 days after my first AC treatment (2 days after my 2nd), my hair started to come out.  My mom was visiting at the time, so I told her today was the day to shave it.  As a military family, we have a set of clippers at home, so I dug them out and my mom went to town.

Here's what that looks like.
I know lots of girls that did this with a glass of wine and did crazy haircuts.

But honestly, I was too tired that day (if you can't tell by that first photo). 

I personally think this was the right decision for me.  I was ready for it to go.  I was sick of waiting for it to fall out.  I was sick of waiting for cancer to deal me another blow.  So I shaved it.

And then dug out my lint roller!  Remember, just because you shaved doesn't mean what's left won't fall out!  Seriously, the stubble falling out is like snow and it gets everywhere.  Lint rollers help with that immensely and it kinda feels good when your scalp starts to hurt.  Apparently my 2 year old remembers me doing this because the other day he found a lint roller... and ran it over his head.  Kids can make anything look cute :)



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