I'm smuggling baseballs - The Funny Thing About Cancer
Seriously.  I feel like I'm currently smuggling baseballs in my bra.

Well... I haven't worn a bra in 3 weeks, so I guess that statement isn't quite right, but you know what I mean.

If you don't, let me say it like this:  Tissue Expanders are not soft.  They don't feel anything like real boobs.  In fact, they feel like baseballs under your skin.  Thus, I feel like I'm smuggling baseballs.

On the upside, my boobs haven't been this perky in... actually I don't think they've ever been this perky.

I'm not complaining.  It's just a very odd sensation.  Since they stick straight out, I have boob in places I've never had boob before.  Normally when doing things like typing, my inner arm would press against my boob a little bit... and my boob would compress/move with my arm.  And now, my boob presses back against my arm. 

It's like my arm and my boob are having a full out wrestling match and my boob is winning.

Totally wierd.

I also had my first "fill" yesterday.  This is where the doctor sticks a needle into my tissue expander and pumps in more saline to fill up the expander.  This was a very interesting experience.

First, the doctor sticks a needle in THROUGH my muscle (because the hole in the expander is at the top of my boob), and that's just a very ODD sensation.  Not painful, just really wierd.

THEN, the thing that they use to pump saline in... is a caulk gun. 

I shit you not.

They load a huge syringe into a caulk gun and then the nurse sits there and squeezes the handle repeatedly until the appropriate amount of saline has been added to your boob.  AND the caulk gun looks really old.  The paint was chipping off and it just looked like they had bought it from a plumber that had used it for 40+ years.

I hope that wasn't the case, but that's what it looked like.  Maybe next time I will sneak a photo of it before the doctor comes in so you can see what I mean.

So that is my current state of affairs.  I'm a rock hard, caulk gun filled, perky boobed girl.  And feeling awesome!

PS  In really great news, I'm also now drain free!  I had my last drain removed yesterday!!!!  YIPPEEEE!
7/22/2011 11:17:45 am

Yep - you describe it exactly - but this is what it takes to get "pretty bobbies". A couple of tips - don't rush the fills - let your skins stretch slowly and beautifully. 2 - take any pain killers about an hour before you go - that way your muscles don't tighten up - works much better if you don't wait for tight muscles or pain before you take em. The girls will be back before you know it.


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